{"id":39292,"date":"2021-04-23T13:47:56","date_gmt":"2021-04-23T19:47:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.uchealth.org\/today\/?p=39292"},"modified":"2022-01-31T12:39:58","modified_gmt":"2022-01-31T19:39:58","slug":"losing-family-to-covid-infectious-disease-expert-loses-aunt-uncle-to-coronavirus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.uchealth.org\/today\/losing-family-to-covid-infectious-disease-expert-loses-aunt-uncle-to-coronavirus\/","title":{"rendered":"The pandemic has devastated too many families, even hers"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>
\"losing
Dr. Michelle Barron can barely speak about the devastation of losing family to COVID-19. Here, she holds her wedding album with photos of her aunt and uncle, who died of COVID-19 in August and September, 33 days apart. Photo by Cyrus McCrimmon for UCHealth.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Ricardo T\u00e9llez was always dancing.<\/p>\n

Dr. Michelle Barron remembers bringing a friend home from college to Laredo, Texas. Across the backyard fence from her parents\u2019 house, they spotted the man next door cleaning his pool.

Para ver las p\u00e1ginas web de UCHealth en espa\u00f1ol, vaya a UCHealth.org y presione el bot\u00f3n \u201cSelect Language\u201d (es decir, seleccione el lenguaje) en la esquina superior derecha de la ventana. Luego, en el men\u00fa desplegable, seleccione \u201cSpanish\u201d (espa\u00f1ol), o cualquier otro idioma que desee.<\/div>\n

It was Barron\u2019s uncle, Ricardo, a Navy veteran who served 28 years with the Laredo Police Department.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe was blasting music. He\u2019d scoop up some leaves, then do some dance moves,\u201d Barron said with a giggle. \u201cHe was a very colorful individual.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ricardo\u2019s wife, Marisela, glided her way through life with her husband: dancing, holding legendary parties for any and all occasions, working as a teaching assistant for special education children after her first career and enjoying road trips in the family\u2019s RV. Sometimes Marisela rolled her eyes when Ricardo dragged her on crazy adventures, like detouring hundreds of miles to a \u201cmust-see\u201d corn palace in South Dakota. But mostly, she smiled and enjoyed the ride.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey were each other\u2019s opposites, but also complemented one other. They were like salt and pepper. He was the pepper. She was the salt of the earth,\u201d said Barron.<\/p>\n

\"Ricardo
Ricardo and Marisela T\u00e9llez. Photo courtesy of the T\u00e9llez family.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

One of the top infectious disease experts in Colorado<\/a>, Barron has been working around the clock for over a year to keep UCHealth hospital workers and Coloradans safe from the COVID-19 pandemic.<\/p>\n

Yet, even Barron\u2019s family couldn\u2019t escape the devastation that the coronavirus has wrought.<\/p>\n

Barron\u2019s voice cracks with emotion when she talks about Rick and Mari, as friends and family knew them. They were like second parents to her. And, they are among nearly 575,000 people in the U.S. and more than 3 million worldwide who so far have died from COVID-19. Rick was 73, Mari just 65.<\/p>\n

The total number of lives lost during the pandemic is almost incomprehensible \u2014 in the U.S., nearly double the number of service members who died during World War II.<\/p>\n

But, zoom in close and you\u2019ll see how the loss of vibrant, beloved people like Mari and Rick have left heartbreaking holes in families and communities. Married for 38 years, they were parents to five children, 12 grandchildren and 12 great-grandchildren.<\/p>\n

What strikes Barron is how many others are suffering, just like her family.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe are not unique. That\u2019s what makes me so sad. You look at the hundreds of thousands of people who are gone,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

The pandemic has been especially hard on people of color. Black people and Latinos, like Rick and Mari, have suffered some of the highest rates of illness and death in the U.S., but so far, have received vaccines at lower rates.<\/p>\n

\"Dr.
Dr. Michelle Barron holds a photo from her wedding when she posed with her Uncle Rick. Photo by Cyrus McCrimmon for UCHealth.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Barron is begging everyone to get vaccinated as soon as possible.<\/p>\n

\u201cEncourage your family members to get vaccinated now,\u201d said Barron, senior medical director of infection prevention and control for UCHealth<\/a>\u00a0and a professor of medicine and infectious diseases<\/a>\u00a0at the\u00a0University of Colorado School of Medicine<\/a>\u00a0on the\u00a0Anschutz Medical Campus<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe vaccine is safe. Several million of us have received vaccines. We have not had any issues. It works. And as vaccine rates go up, we can see COVID-19 case numbers go down,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

\u201cAll of my family members are vaccinated or are in the process of getting vaccinated. We all know that if my aunt and uncle had had the option to get vaccinated, they would still be here.\u201d<\/p>\n

Each coronavirus death has been tragic. Getting a high percentage of people vaccinated \u2014 from all communities \u2014 can help prevent additional casualties.<\/p>\n

\u201cDeath from COVID-19 can happen to anyone. It\u2019s so devastating. I knew everything there was to know. I\u2019m an infectious disease expert, and still, it happened to my family,\u201d Barron said. \u201cWe don\u2019t want anyone else to have this same suffering.\u201d<\/p>\n

Always up for a party, always eager to help<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Road trips with Rick and Mari were sometimes zany, sometimes practical and always fun.<\/p>\n

Barron is the only medical doctor in her extended family. She left her tight-knit family and community on the border with Texas and Mexico after high school and headed to one of the most revered institutions in the country for college \u2013 Yale University. After Yale, Barron returned to Texas for medical school, then traveled around the country for residency and fellowships.<\/p>\n

Every step of the way, Rick and Mari volunteered to help Barron move. They called her \u201cDr. Shelley,\u201d or Shell for short.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey were a big part of my life. They moved me to Dallas, to Omaha, to Denver,\u201d Barron recalls.<\/p>\n

\"Losing
Dr. Michelle Barron is an infectious disease expert who has spent more than a year keeping people safe from COVID-19. But, even she has lost family members. She’s mourning a beloved aunt and uncle who died of COVID-19. Photo by Cyrus McCrimmon for UCHealth.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

\u201cWhen I moved from Omaha to Denver, we got a 15-foot U-Haul and a car trailer. My uncle and aunt were driving the RV. My cousin, Marisa, and I were driving the U-Haul. We had walkie-talkies,\u201d Barron recalled.<\/p>\n

\u201cI got pretty comfortable driving the U-Haul and I passed an 18-wheeler. My cousin and I were laughing,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

\"losing
Ricardo T\u00e9llez was a proud veteran. Photo courtesy of the T\u00e9llez family.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Then, a message crackled over the walkie-talkie.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re driving crazy. This is a U-Haul, not a Corvette,\u201d Rick said.<\/p>\n

Barron and her cousin didn\u2019t respond.<\/p>\n

\u201cI know you can hear me,\u201d Rick bellowed.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy cousin and I were laughing so hard,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

Now, Barron would give anything to laugh in person with her aunt and uncle again.<\/p>\n

After moving Barron from place to place, Rick and Mari would spend hours getting her settled in.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey would organize everything, telling me, \u2018You need to do this and that.\u2019 The whole truck would be unpacked. They wouldn\u2019t leave until all the pictures were hung and we had made 50 million trips to Target,\u201d Barron said, tears welling in her eyes as she thinks of her aunt and uncle\u2019s unwavering support and kindness.<\/p>\n

A final road trip<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Last summer, after patiently and carefully making it through the first wave of the pandemic, Rick was itching to take a road trip.<\/p>\n

His health was already compromised.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe had been in the Navy and worked in shipyards, where he got asbestos exposure. And, he was a smoker,\u201d Barron said. \u201cHe had terrible lung disease and was on oxygen.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mari\u2019s lungs weren\u2019t in perfect shape either. In recent years, she had been sick with pneumonia and bronchitis and had been diagnosed with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease or COPD<\/a>. Like a disproportionate number of people in the Latino community, Mari also had diabetes.<\/p>\n

\"Losing
Ricardo and Marisela T\u00e9llez loved taking road trips in their RV and posing for silly photos at museums and tourist attractions. Photo courtesy of the T\u00e9llez family.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Despite their vulnerabilities to faring poorly if they got COVID-19, Rick and Mari announced to the family that they were going to hit the road at the end of June.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe was determined. He said, \u2018I don\u2019t know that I\u2019m going to live another summer. We\u2019re going to do one last trip,\u2019\u201d Barron recalled.<\/p>\n

Several family members \u2014 including Barron \u2014 encouraged the couple to stay home.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe said, \u2018This is a bad idea. Please don\u2019t do this,\u2019\u201d Barron recalled.<\/p>\n

But, Rick insisted and Mari supported her husband.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m going to live life. We\u2019ll be careful,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n

They set out and took all the precautions. They wore masks and gloves everywhere. They used sanitizer and religiously kept their distance from other people.<\/p>\n

They went to some favorite places including South Dakota and Las Vegas, then returned home, seemingly healthy and happy.<\/p>\n

\u201cSee. We\u2019re fine,\u201d Rick said.<\/p>\n

A week later, both Rick and Mari got sick. Within days of each other, they had to be hospitalized and ended up dying 33 days apart, Rick first and Mari a little over a month later.<\/p>\n

Altogether, seven family members got COVID-19.<\/p>\n

\"Losing
Dr. Michelle Barron was extremely close with her aunt and uncle, who lived next door when Barron was growing up. She fondly remembers happy times, like her wedding, when she posed with her cousins and her Uncle Rick and Aunt Mari. Photo by Cyrus McCrimmon for UCHealth.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

It\u2019s not clear where Rick and Mari picked up the virus. Maybe the road trip was perfectly safe as they hoped it would be. It\u2019s possible that they got exposed to the coronavirus when they returned home and picked up groceries.<\/p>\n

Like many communities in Texas\u2019 Rio Grande Valley, Laredo has suffered with high COVID-19 case counts throughout the pandemic.<\/p>\n

Barron knows that the close family ties in the Hispanic community sadly have cost people their lives.<\/p>\n

\u201cMultiple generations live together. That was true for my aunt and uncle. Their grandson lived with them some of the time. My cousin had an apartment upstairs. We all gathered all the time. We had a tradition where everybody would come over on Sundays for breakfast or lunch,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

Barron\u2019s own mother was devastated when she couldn\u2019t do anything to comfort her little sister. The two had lived right next door to one another for decades. But Barron had to advise her mom to stay away or she would get sick too.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy mom is 13 years older,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

Barron had to give firm orders to her mom:<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can\u2019t go over and see her. You can see her from the window. You can\u2019t go in. You can leave them soup on the doorstep,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

Barron felt that same powerlessness from afar. She considered flying from Colorado to Texas, but knew that her counterparts at the Laredo hospital \u2014 the infection control specialists \u2014 rightly wouldn\u2019t allow her to visit. Instead, she consulted frequently by phone with her aunt and uncle\u2019s nurses and doctors.<\/p>\n

\u201cI put my faith in the people who were caring for her,\u201d Barron said. \u201cThey did all the right things. They gave them all the medications they needed. They gave them steroids. They just didn\u2019t work.\u201d<\/p>\n

A last wave: \u2018Good night. I love you.\u2019<\/strong><\/h2>\n

M\u00f3nica T\u00e9llez-Arst\u00e9 is Barron\u2019s cousin and Rick and Mari\u2019s middle child.<\/p>\n

She and the rest of the family had to endure a roller coaster of emotions after Rick and Mari got COVID-19.<\/p>\n

\u201cMom was admitted before dad,\u201d M\u00f3nica said. \u201cShe knew he was sick. My brother took him to get tested, then that night, my dad arrived at the hospital. My mom was there and the nurses allowed them to see each other. Their rooms were across the hall from one another.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey waved to each other, said, \u2018good night\u2019 and \u2018I love you,\u2019\u201d M\u00f3nica said.<\/p>\n

That would be the last time they ever saw each other.<\/p>\n

Rick declined very quickly and passed away on Aug. 7.<\/p>\n

\"Losing
Losing family to COVID has been devastating. Here, M\u00f3nica T\u00e9llez-Arst\u00e9 poses in a selfie with her mom, Marisela T\u00e9llez, who died of COVID-19 in September. Photo courtesy of M\u00f3nica T\u00e9llez-Arst\u00e9.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

By that time, Mari was fighting for her life on a ventilator.<\/p>\n

Family members chose not to tell her that Rick had died.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe was never lucid enough to know. We thought, \u2018When she gets through this, we\u2019re going to have to tell her,\u2019\u201d M\u00f3nica said.<\/p>\n

As with many critically ill COVID-19 patients, Mari went through ups and downs.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe fought for 33 days. We were praying for her to fight and she did. We would say, \u2018Dad, don\u2019t take her.\u2019 We knew dad was calling to her to come with him,\u201d M\u00f3nica said.<\/p>\n

In the end, Mari got weaker and weaker and died on September 10.<\/p>\n

As devastated as family, friends and community members were to lose Mari, they had a profound sense that she couldn\u2019t bear to go on without her husband.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey were joined at the hip. They just couldn\u2019t be away from each other,\u201d M\u00f3nica said. \u201cIt was the ultimate, sad love story.\u201d<\/p>\n

M\u00f3nica now is part of an ever-growing Facebook group for people who have lost loved ones to COVID-19. The stories of loss are heartbreaking and seemingly endless.<\/p>\n

M\u00f3nica, like Barron, is begging people to get vaccines as soon as possible.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s about being a good neighbor and taking care of people who are close to you. You don\u2019t know how this disease affects others. Some perfectly healthy people have gotten sick and died. You don\u2019t know. You might be OK. You might not,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

A perfect team until the end<\/strong><\/h2>\n

The challenge for the family now is carrying on without the couple who loved bringing everyone together.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy parents were an amazing force. They were always about a party and celebrating and traveling. They did everything big. If there was a birthday, graduation, any occasion, it was going to be a big to-do,\u201d M\u00f3nica said.<\/p>\n

Ricardo loved giving everyone nicknames. He dubbed Barron\u2019s husband, \u201cGreyhound\u201d because he\u2019s skinny and loves to run.<\/p>\n

Mari loved remembering everyone\u2019s birthdays and even mailed cards to co-workers from her high school who had summer birthdays.<\/p>\n

She and her sister also created beautiful decorations for Barron\u2019s wedding.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe and my mom did my entire wedding, everybody\u2019s weddings,\u201d Barron said. \u201cThey said, \u2018You\u2019re getting married in October. We\u2019re going to do a fall theme with cornucopia and apples and Mexican candy.\u2019 It was beautiful and insane how much they did.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Losing
Ricardo and Marisela T\u00e9llez loved dancing, hosting parties, celebrating any occasion and dressing up for holidays. When it’s safe, their family looks forward to holding a celebreation to honor and remember them. Photo courtesy of the T\u00e9llez family.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

They also helped find a mariachi band to play during dinner. Then came the dancing.<\/p>\n

Rick and Mari were probably among the first on the dance floor.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey glided everywhere. They were so in sync,\u201d M\u00f3nica said. \u201cMy mom loved The Beatles, Dad, Roy Orbison, and they loved Tejano music.\u201d<\/p>\n

Both also loved Los Lobos\u2019 Maricela about a woman who loves to dance. They joked that it was written just for Marisela.<\/p>\n

\u201cEven though they were taken too soon, in the time they were here, they lived life fully. They were adventurous go-getters. They weren\u2019t scared. They reached their goals. They were a good team,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

And, they were close to being able to relax full time.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy mom was going to retire in December. My dad had been retired for about 14 years,\u201d said M\u00f3nica, a teacher in Austin.<\/p>\n

When the pandemic finally ends and it\u2019s safe for the family to gather once again, Barron, M\u00f3nica and others can\u2019t wait to have a giant party to celebrate Rick and Mari.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll rent out the police hall, get a band and have great music,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

Of course, there will be dancing.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what they would have wanted,\u201d Barron said.<\/p>\n

When she thinks of her beloved aunt and uncle, sometimes she cries. Other times, she\u2019s angry. And sometimes, she smiles and laughs.<\/p>\n

She\u2019s sure that they\u2019re throwing a big party in heaven at this very moment.<\/p>\n

They\u2019re probably getting everyone out on the dance floor, encouraging everyone to dance a cumbia, with plenty of hip movement.<\/p>\n

Or, maybe Uncle Rick is cleaning the pools.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ricardo T\u00e9llez was always dancing. Dr. Michelle Barron remembers bringing a friend home from college to Laredo, Texas. Across the backyard fence from her parents\u2019 house, they spotted the man next door cleaning his pool. It was Barron\u2019s uncle, Ricardo, a Navy veteran who served 28 years with the Laredo Police Department. \u201cHe was blasting […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2123,"featured_media":39306,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_relevanssi_hide_post":"","_relevanssi_hide_content":"","_relevanssi_pin_for_all":"","_relevanssi_pin_keywords":"","_relevanssi_unpin_keywords":"","_relevanssi_related_keywords":"","_relevanssi_related_include_ids":"","_relevanssi_related_exclude_ids":"","_relevanssi_related_no_append":"","_relevanssi_related_not_related":"","_relevanssi_related_posts":"","_relevanssi_noindex_reason":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[4859,4860,9069],"class_list":["post-39292","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories","tag-coronavirus","tag-covid-19","tag-covid-19-vaccine"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nThe pandemic has devastated too many families, even hers - UCHealth Today<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Losing family to COVID-19 has become too common. 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